Jesus said, “Anyone who loves his father or mother more than me is not worthy of me; anyone who loves his son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me; and anyone who does not take his cross and follow me is not worthy of me.”(Matthew 10:37-38) And then the first and great commandment in both the Old and New Testaments, “You shall love the Lord your God with all of your heart, soul, mind, and strength.” These are hard sayings. Our Lord wants to be at the very center of our lives. He wants us to consider Him first above all else, and all others. I really want this, too, but I don’t see it. As much as I would like to say it is true in me, I always see a mixture. The “I want”, “I deserve”, “I need”, I should have”, always get in the way. I’m a mixture. What? 60/40, 90/10, more likely 30/70! I am forced to cry out with St. Paul, “What a wretched man I am! Who will rescue me from this body of death?”(Romans 7:24) There is no hope in me. Again and again I must turn to the only place Paul found hope saying, “Thanks be to God, through Jesus Christ our Lord! … there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.” (vs.25, 8:1) I still want Jesus at my center, but He alone does for me what I can’t do for myself.